The Best Damn Guac

As far as most foods are concerned, I believe that most people prefer the version at their favourite restaurant, that mom makes or perhaps that they had once on vacation.  Nobody likes their own recipe best.

I generally feel the same, except when it comes to hot spinach dip and guacamole. Mine are the best. Bar none. Deal with it.

My guacamole is always the first dip to run out at parties. It’s often served along side at least one other of my signature dips and it’s always the first to go. Vegans flock to it, vegetarians and omnis will wrestle their way past the vegans to get a taste before it runs out.

Even my vegan ex-boyfriend , who seems to fancy himself a guac connoisseur, has proclaimed it to be “the best domestic guacamole” he’s ever had.  He’s not just buttering me up. I asked again, post-breakup, to make sure that I get to keep my title – and I do!

Enough masturbating my own ego.

For me guac has to be simple enough to compliment whatever it’s being used in (tacos, sandwiches, etc) but bold enough to hold it’s own on a pita or chip. This means no chunks of tomato or jalapeño and NO CILANTRO! (ew!).   It took some experimenting, but a few years ago I came up with a perfect recipe. I’d vowed to myself to keep it secret. After all, this guac has gotten me laid and is probably one of the only reasons people come to my parties.

I’m in need of a little good karma, so I’m finally sharing the recipe.

You will need:

• 4 ripe avocados
• 2 medium sized cloves of garlic, finely chopped
• the juice of 2 limes
• 1-2 teaspoons of ground cumin
• 1 teaspoon of sea salt

As you may well know, I don’t actually measure, but these measurements are a good foundation. Augment the amounts according to your taste.

There’s not much else to say, mash everything together with a fork and put it in the fridge for a few hours. Overnight is best, but who can wait that long?